A Note from the Chef
Do new beginnings have a date on the calendar, or do they follow a date particular to us? Or are they simply a natural sequence to the unfolding drama of our lives? This is what I’ve been pondering lately.
Every new year offers us the opportunity to make changes we’ve been longing for and usually by the time February rolls around’ most of our good intentions have given way to old patterns. Sound familiar? Rather than beat yourself up for failing – yet again – why not accept that some changes have to happen according to their own rhythm, when the time truly is right. Acceptance (and trust) for what is or isn’t happening is not only a kinder way to treat yourself, but far more effective for getting what you want. And it has staying power.
I’ve known for years that I had to make a significant change – one that would make my life a lot less stressful; and it wasn’t so much that I was resistant to making the change (though I know I had plenty of that going on), but mostly I knew it wasn’t the right time. One year I came really close to making it happen (just shy of the time when this change would be irreversible) when all of my instincts made me stop, pen in hand – even though it seemed the logical thing to do. Now I’m so glad I waited! This time, this change happened just as it should…on its own schedule.
John Lennon’s wise lyrics, “…life happens when we’re busy making other plans…” keeps reminding me to look at my ‘failures’ differently.
The process for this change was initiated in the last several months and started coming to fruition as easily as 2012 turned into 20I3. What a pleasant surprise. For too long ‘struggle’ was a main ingredient. I tried like hell to let go of it many times, but still it lingered…like the smell of cooking fish long after you’ve eaten the dish. There’s no escaping the invasive odor and little one can do to mask it other than wait for it to dissipate. When it does, the clean air feels sweeter because you clearly remember when it wasn’t. In the same way, success is so much sweeter when you can appreciate what it took to get there – and you are grateful.
The details that led to this trans formative place for me, this new beginning, is a story for another time and place. Let’s just say that I started the new year not hoping for something to change, but seeing the evidence of it. I have a new sense of freedom that for too long was missing, but that I trusted one day would return. There’s a difference between going through challenging times, feeling that they shouldn’t be happening, and going through them suspecting – knowing – they have purpose. Challenging times can either beat you up or boost you up. One way is taken with resistance, the other with acceptance. One way you sink and the other you grow.
If we can accept that there is purpose to everything that happens to us, we are not as likely to fight back – even when you think life is fighting you. You surrender to the circumstances – whatever they may be – and one day the war is over. If you don’t join in the fight, there is no fight. This is a powerful and wise position to take. It’s simple, but far from easy. It’s taken most of my life to get this (and still, at times, I flounder) and like most of us I have my war scars to prove it. The difference is that now they feel more like my medals
Gratitude – Acceptance – Trust. They always work.
Wishing you all an abundance of this titanium trio in this new year…already unfolding full speed ahead.